Ask a Better Question

 Welcome to LifeByMark Installment #4!

How do you approach difficult, untenable or complicated decisions?  

• How do we enter this market?
• How do we save for retirement?
• How do I get healthy/fit?

If you're like many people, you likely seek to simplify the problem by starting with your perceived constraints - the things you "can't" do:

• "Someone else owns this part of the market already"
• "I can't find any money to save"
• "I don't have time"
• etc.

I would like to suggest that starting with constraints is "asking the wrong question".  I have suggested to many teams over the years that a better way to begin is to ask where do you really want to end up first. Why?  I find that often once I've finished considering all the constraints (what can/can't I do?) there are no longer any possible destinations worth going to. 

So, you might think that means there aren't any good destinations.  I have found that absolutely not to be the case.  Focusing on constraints demoralizes us and closes our minds to possible solutions.  I have found that once we decide where we really want to go, i.e, a compelling destination, our minds become unleashed to work on and solve the constraints - and creativity flows.

In my career I led the creation of many business strategies and business plans.  I can tell you that in each case when we began the process, the team would start listing all the constraints until there was no useful destination anymore - "we will never get that approved", "we don't have funding for that", "someone else owns that market already", etc., etc. 

In each case I asked the team to work with me and told them that I had seen these types of constraints overcome successfully before.  I was generally able to get them to work with me, sometimes with an air of "well if you want to waste our time", until we came up with a potential destination that was motivating enough to make us want to work on those constraints.  

Notice, the constraints were still there, but once a person has visualized a compelling destination it is amazing how creative the human mind can be in finding ways around, over or under constraints and obstacles to that destination.

In one noteworthy case, after we worked hard to understand and capture market need and formulate a market-focused strategy we brought a very compelling destination to our leadership in the form of a business plan.  We were able to get funding for our business increased by almost 20 times from one year to the next, including a mid-year infusion!  That business went on to capture $1B in new orders in a new market in the next 3 years.  That business is now the market leader in a market in which it had a negligible position 3 years prior.

The compelling destination was more important than the constraints!

On a personal level - 8 years ago, after years of thinking about it, I lost 35 pounds.  I remain at my new, healthy weight today.  How?  I took away all the constraints.  There had been food and drinks I had declared non-negotiable.  I had not been open to new practices.  Then I watched as my Mother died at 77, after my father had died at 74 ten years earlier.  I realized I wanted to be healthy, fit and active as long as possible.

I finally decided that I would do whatever it takes to get fit and healthy (a compelling destination).  As such, "everything was on the table".  So, my wife and I agreed to weigh in weekly and write down our weight.  We agreed to eliminate most carbs and learn by weighing in what caused our weight to go up or down.  We increased our exercise regimen to help with our fitness.  Mostly though, we decided that this was not a temporary exercise to get to our goal, but was a permanent lifestyle change.  

It took about 17 months to get there.  All of my "numbers" got better.  It is great to feel light on my feet!  We returned to our love of hiking and now do a great deal of mountain climbing/hiking - I'll talk about that in another blog.  We are still very disciplined about our diet and exercise.  We don't crave the things we used to eat and drink.  It doesn't feel like a burden - it's just how we live.

Thanks for reading!  I hope you find a compelling destination and make the decision to pursue it!

Mark

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