Give the Gift of Listening

 Welcome to LifeByMark Installment #3!

So... picking up on the theme of my last post "Give the Gift of Friendship", my wife and I are also working on its first cousin: "Give the Gift of Listening".  

Now we all know people who are just good at this.  I have to say, I have always admired, and in some cases, been in awe of these people.  I know people right now that are just amazing at this. This is not a natural strength of mine, but I want it to become one!  I was a little cautious of writing about this for fear that some of the people to whom I have not listened well might respond to point it out! 

So I know that suggesting that we should all listen better is not exactly an original idea.  We've likely been told that our whole lives.  The only "new" idea here is the same one I mentioned in my last blog, which is to think of it as a gift we give others, rather than just a self betterment step.  It's not about me getting to state my case or make my point, it's about letting someone else make their point and feel heard.

What does this look like for us?  My wife and I have given ourselves a written goal of becoming good at this.  We check in every week to give each other feedback on whether we are doing this well.  I think it is working.  I am finding it more natural to start with listening, and specifically to set aside thinking up a response while the other person is talking (all of you guilty of this can admit it now!).

The great news is that other people have some very interesting things to say and you can learn a lot by listening intently MORE than talking.  For those of you who learned this early, or for some reason were always just good at this, please be patient with us verbal people.  Some of us are working on it!

Happy Listening!

Mark

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